“As some people seem confused by this: My former MIL still contacts me frequently. Just not interested in new wife, kids, or my feelings with that. That’s why it feels like a biased relationship, because every time something good happens in my life, she tells me, ‘but you can’t forget about your first wife and kid.’ I understand where this comes from, but if you want a relationship with me, it is also with me and my life as a whole, and not some parts you choose at your convenience.”
Redditors flooded the comments section under the man’s post with their emotional opinions.
Call or visit and tell them that this is the last time.
Of course you’ll never forget your first wife but, you can’t stay locked in grief. You’re sorry but you can no longer keep up this one way relationship. They need to decide if they want you for you.
It’s now up to them.
- One user , “My family lost my oldest sister (29 at the time), and we still keep in touch with her husband. My parents still go to dinner with him at least once a month.
When he was ready to start dating again, he talked to my parents and was terrified that the family would be mad at him for moving on, but we all encouraged him to date and find happiness again. It seems that her parents are still struggling so they want to watch you struggle too and that’s not at all fair to you.”
- Another one , “You need to move on and find joy with your wonderful new family. You have done nothing wrong.
After all the heartache, you deserve to be happy. Remember that you are not their emotional crutch. You even gave them part of the inheritance.
Congratulations on your twins. Go live your life in peace.”
- One more user , “I can’t help but think that they blame OP somehow for her death. Doesn’t matter what the actual circumstances are, because grief isn’t always rational.
OP, I wish you much happiness. I’d stop answering all of the texts, or at least make her wait longer for a reply, which should be as generic as possible.”
- Some other user , “Also, how dare this woman say ’don’t forget your dead family’ like that is incredibly small-minded and just insulting to be honest. That makes me so mad and sad, thinking about someone saying that to me about a lost loved one.
I would go bananas.”
- Another person , “You’re not guilty. I am a widow, and I had to end my relationship with my in-laws because they were also incredibly negative and invasive. I promise you that your life will be easier and your new wife and children will be happier if you end this relationship and move on with your life.
Trust me, there is no purpose in continuing to communicate with people who can’t find happiness in your happiness.”
This man isn’t the only one with trouble with his in-laws. Another reader, a 35-year-old woman named Kelly, is desperate because of her intricate relationship with her MIL. While many women are complaining that their mothers-in-law are misbehaving with them, and it costs a lot of effort for them to win their appreciation, Kelly’s story is just the opposite.
Her mother-in-law is the kindest person on Earth, and she’s never said a bad word about Kelly. But our heroine is struggling so much, because she actually hates the mother of her husband, and she gave her reasons for it in her candid letter to us.
