A 65-year-old woman wrote to us, wanting to share her story.
Her life took a tragic turn when her son and daughter-in-law passed away, and she took custody of her grandchildren, raising them.
Now, her granddaughter has behaved unexpectedly.
Emma wrote us a letter and shared her painful story with us.
Emma, 65, has been a loyal reader and a source of wise advice for people facing difficult situations.
She never expected that one day she would find herself needing support, sharing her own painful story.
Emma expressed her desire to hear others’ opinions about her situation and actions after discovering that things in her family had become very unhealthy.
Emma began her letter, “Hi! I’m writing this letter with a whirlwind of emotions as I reflect on a recent event that deeply affected my family and me.
I have two grandkids, who are now grown and well-established in their lives.
I’ve been both their grandmother and mother since they were 10 and 12 years old. My son and his wife tragically died in a car accident, leaving my grandkids without parents in an instant.
The grief was overwhelming.
I felt like my life was over, having lost my only son and my beloved daughter-in-law.
To survive this immense tragedy, I had to find new purpose and meaning.
I poured all my love and energy into my grandchildren, Paul and Rachel, who became my lifeline after that devastating loss.”
Emma spent a big part of her life taking care of her 2 grandchildren.
Emma shared, “When Rachel and Paul lost their parents, they were old enough to understand the tragedy.
Seeing them in such despair broke my heart.
I immediately arranged therapy for both of them and went through it with them.
I worked hard to appear optimistic and be a guiding light for them, even though I was still grieving.
I had to pull myself together for their well-being and comfort.”
“After the tragedy, my life changed drastically.
I went from being a grandmother to being both a mother and father to those kids.
I became their sole caretaker and provider.
My mission was to ensure Rachel and Paul had everything they needed and more.
I worked tirelessly to provide them with a good life and education, raising them with love and care.”
Emma made sure that her grandkids prosper in life.
Emma explained, “Rachel and Paul are now grown up, both engaged, and have their own homes and well-paying jobs.
Paul lives with his fiancée, while Rachel currently lives alone because her partner lives in another state, and she plans to join him later this year.
Feeling lonely after they moved out, I recently asked Rachel if I could live with her in the large house I helped her buy.
She agreed, but now I realize she wasn’t truly happy about it. I had hoped we could enjoy more time together, but I misunderstood her feelings and our ability to make living together work.”
“One day, I overheard Rachel talking to Paul on the phone. She was angrily saying that she can’t stand me anymore.
She said that I became a burden for her because I didn’t contribute that much to the finances of the family.
Rachel also complained that I was spending my days painting, which, by some reason, irritated and annoyed her.
Apparently, Paul was trying to reason her, saying that I’m their grandmother and I raised them both.
But Rachel said that this all was then, and now things are different, and she wanted me to go away immediately.
She called my paintings a ’sentimental nonsense’ and said that for her, I was a ’dead weight’ which she would prefer to get rid of.”
Emma shared, “Rachel also said that Paul must now take me in, which he happily did.
I moved to his house within a week after that conversation, and I was given a loving and caring attitude from Paul and his fiancée.
And they gave me so much more!”
Emma taught both of her grandkids an important lesson one day.
Emma recounted, “Tina, Paul’s fiancée, discovered my paintings and urged me to show them to one of her art connections.
To my surprise and delight, he was impressed by my artistic style and organized an exhibition in a prominent gallery.
I was thrilled to learn that my art resonated with people, with 20 paintings quickly selling out and earning me a tidy sum.
The exhibition even gave me a moment of fame that I’ll always cherish.
“During the event, Rachel unexpectedly appeared.
She approached me, expressing regret for her past actions, and I wholeheartedly forgave her.
However, her subsequent inquiry about the money from my art sales revealed her underlying intentions.
It became clear she wanted something from me, prompting me to devise a plan for how I would wisely use the unexpected earnings.”
Emma wrote, “I took a microphone and said that I wanted to make an important speech.
I told the whole story of my life to so many people who were present at the exhibition.
There were a lot of relatives and friends of Paul and Rachel, and even their colleagues.
I shared how I was mistreated by Rachel and then said that I don’t hold grudges against her and I forgive her for this selfish act of hers.
And then, I announced that I’m giving all my money to Paul’s fiancée, Tina, who believed in me and in my art and who didn’t find it a ’sentimental nonsense’.
I also announced that, from now on, I will paint even more pictures and that every single one that will be sold in the future, will contribute to the wellbeing of the person who has a kind and loving heart, Tina.”
Emma said, “Rachel left the exhibition without saying a word to me, she cut contact with me since that day.
I feel hurt by her action and I want to restore our communication, because she still means a lot to me.
But at the same time, I feel that I had to teach her this painful lesson, because she can’t act like this to people who sincerely love her, and I believe this is a good lesson for her and her future.
Am I wrong in this situation?”
Not everyone approved of Emma’s behavior.
- I am not supporting your granddaughter’s behavior, but you were spiteful and vengeful and the consequences are you lost your granddaughter. © Christina Lawson / Facebook
- I think you need to live on your own & make a life for you! But your granddaughter was mean and cruel and though you overheard, it’s just what she thought! Instead of being spiteful back, remove yourself from the relationship you thought you were entitled to, accept your granddaughter is not that way inclined towards you! Your relationship can be cordial and perhaps nothing more! But don’t be spiteful! Rewarding your grandson’s fiancée, was that done as a payback to your granddaughter? That just creates problems for everyone!Would I be the same with my granddaughter? No I would be brokenhearted, but each to their own, and it’s about being gracious for one’s own health! Doing anything for anyone does not come with a payback policy! You did what was needed and bravo, now move on with grace and have a different relationship with your Granddaughter if you want it! © Deborah Joy Cathery / Facebook
- Consider not living with your kids. It sounds like you are making enough money to live on your own. Your grandkids are grown, and have their own lives. You need to make a life for yourself. © Dee Trigueiro Southard / Facebook
- As a senior woman, I understand that you felt disappointed and emotionally hurt by your granddaughter. However, I believe you could have told her your plans to her privately, not stage a public humiliation. I would also disagree with giving all your earnings to your grandson’s fiancé. Perhaps a more wise decision would be to hire her as your manager to work with you on viewings and sales. © Sheila Reese / Facebook
- Calling her out in public is not the way to mend a relationship. You can apologize, but don’t expect it to help much unless she is after your money. You have chosen your favorite, and it isn’t Rachael. © Patricia Lehman / Facebook
