When my in-laws’ apartment was flooded, I didn’t think twice about inviting them to stay with us. But six weeks later, they’d turned my home into their personal hotel, and my wife wouldn’t stop them. That’s when I came up with a plan to get my home back.
I’m the kind of guy who enjoys a quiet life.
Give me an evening at home with my wife, Kelly, our two cats sprawled across the couch, and some mediocre Thai takeout, and I’m happy.
I never expected to end up living with four other people, but when my MIL, Susan, called and told us their basement apartment had flooded, I didn’t think twice about offering them a place to stay.
Kelly’s eyebrows shot up.
“Are you sure about this, David? My family can be… you know.”
“Overbearing?
I know, but they’re family.” I put my arm around her shoulders. “Besides, it’s just until they find a new place.
How bad can it be?”
Kelly sighed.
“You always think you can handle them better than I can.”
They arrived an hour later, all four of them.
Kelly’s mom showed up with three oversized suitcases and a canvas bag full of essential oils. Stan, her dad, hauled in a cooler that looked like it could survive the apocalypse.
Kelly’s sister, Andrea, rolled in with her own luggage set and immediately asked where she could charge her phone.
And Josh, Kelly’s brother, strutted through the door like he was checking into a resort.
“This is awesome,” Josh said, dropping his duffel bag in the hallway.
“You guys have such a nice place.”
They bunked in the guest rooms. We only had two, so Andrea and Josh had to share the hallway bathroom.
Susan and Stan got the bigger guest room with the attached half bath.
It seemed manageable.
I was so naïve.
Within an hour, they’d taken over the kitchen. Susan started rearranging our spice rack.
Stan opened the fridge and frowned like he was inspecting a crime scene.
“No lunch meat?
Not even ham? I’ll just fry up the last of your eggs. I’m starving.”
“Me too,” Josh said, joining Stan in front of the fridge.
Moments later, Andrea was making herself a smoothie with an entire packet of frozen berries, the last of our almond milk, the local honey I got at a farmer’s market, and Kelly’s expensive collagen powder.
Josh found our stash of $30 truffle cheese and made himself a sandwich.
With ketchup.
I almost cried.
The story doesn’t end here –
it continues on the next page.
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